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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself. - Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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Tuesday, July 7, 2009

How to get over regrets and resentments

If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.
- Jim Carrey

Regrets and their cousins, resentments, are a huge cause of self-inflicted suffering. Sometimes it takes years of psychotherapy to gain freedom from regrets about what you did or did not do, and freedom from resentment over what others did or did not do. Sometimes it takes a lifetime of self-talk to remember to put the past in the past where it belongs. However, sometimes a simple symbolic act can help immeasurably to grant ourselves freedom from the past.

One of the quickest ways to move past a regret is to hold a RELEASE ceremony. Reverently build a small fire. Write each regret or resentment on a slip of paper. Hold the paper for a moment, and then feed the paper with the regret or resentment to the cleansing fire. Visualize your trouble going up in smoke. Try it, it's amazingly freeing.


Further reading: How To Stop Worrying By Using the Qigong Release Exercise

The Paradox Of Living In The Moment - How To Be Happy Today And Prepare For Tomorrow

Does it ever get easier to release the resentment and the anger, and to forgive?

Why I Choose to Believe that Others are Never the Cause of My Unhappiness

What To Do When Your Whole World Is Falling Apart? 6 Support Ideas To Stop Anxiety and Give You Back Your Life

Regrets, Resentments and the Path to Forgiveness - Stop Anger & Live Happy With Conscious Awareness

You don't have the power to make life "fair," but you do have the power to make life joyful. - jlh

4 comments:

  1. I have regrets and resentments and I am trying to live in the moment but it gets harder every time. I try not to hate or be a hater but it's hard to forgive some things, but Mr Jonathon Lockwood Huie you have given me the strength and faith to forgive and forget- thank-you. I adore every single newsletter I receive from you they are very comforting and provide me with my daily inspiration.

    Yours Sincerely
    Shriya

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shriya, Thank you so much for your kind words.

    May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
    - Jonathan Lockwood Huie

    ReplyDelete
  3. Where I live would be difficult to make a fire. But I have taken it in a different direction by using a paper shredder to release the regrets. Funny I was sad this morning and there was your inspiration just waiting in my email. Thank you JLH.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Great Sir! your words are soothing to mind&soul.

    ReplyDelete

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